QUARTZSITE 2002 February
01, 2002 Today I still feel awful. I am slow, and have no energy. I don't feel bad enough for bed, and still am visiting, laughing, so on, but not good enough to hit the road. I do a little bit of work, and have to rest for a bit. My chest is just feeling like it wants to explode, nothing to do with the nose or sinuses...which scares me a little. Apparently there is something in the dust here, spores that when moistened become active, and it causes what they call Valley Fever. My friend Jim was telling me that he nearly died from it, taking 6 months to kick it. He even got water on the brain from it, awful stuff. He wrote down the name of the herb that finally cured him of it, which is Oil of Oregano. Nothing the doctors gave him did a thing, in fact antibiotics only encouraged it, but this had him feeling better in days. That and Oregamax capsules. I have heard of several people getting sick down here from this, with all the dust storms and all. I hope I don't have that, and even if I do that my body can cure itself, but the treatment is good to know. I did get into another show though. It is inside, which is a good thing, considering the cold is just killing my chest. I am paying too much for a table, but hopefully it will all be worth it. I think it will be a good show. I want to get on the road early. The show doesn't start until Monday, but I can set up on Sunday night. Inside. Inside, inside. Yey! ~~~ It is sad to me, wrapping up friendships, saying goodbyes, not really knowing when you will see that person again. It is easier for me to just leave, but I am slowly doing this, plenty of time for goodbyes. I think this is particularly hard on Don. We have grown close, and not only having to say goodbye, but waiting for me to leave, not really knowing when it is I AM leaving. He readies himself for it, then I prolong it another day. I am putting off leaving simply because I am not really ready, due to no energy getting it all ready. But, also I think it is hard for me to leave. I like Quartzsite. I like it alot. I am going to miss it. ~~~ Mark came by today. I was glad, I was hoping to see him again before I left. We sat and chatted for a good couple of hours. He reads people's energy, and said mine has been plexing him. Or, rather, what our actual exchange is, why were we thrown together. Upon talking, he again noticed and commented on my energy, of which he does when he sees me at times. He said the loving energy I project is one of my most drawing points, my capacity for love is great, but I harbor it, hold it tight within. I do project it, but not as freely as I could. Let's see, it is hard to remember what he said, and what he meant by it all, but when he is talking it is all so significant. I protect my love, and control it, giving it to select people, and even then, not completely. He also said I am a helper of sorts, a healer in a way for others. That I help others with transformation. I wish I could remember more of what he said, I wish I had a tape recorder when he was talking, I absorb it, but forget the actual words he says. I am thinking I had better email him right away...I don't want to lose contact with him. Mark has been one of the gems found out here in this dusty crazy place. He did some energy work on me. ~~~ I also talked to the other guys that sell next to me tonight, they are brothers, miners, live in their van, Their names are Dean and Blue. I like them, they are both very earthy and seem to have a very good sense of life. I wish I had gotten to know them better, but they moved by me later in the show, when I was at Pow Wow and then I was closed here, otherwise I would have had a chance to get to know them. ~~~ Don came by tonight after his drive in the desert. I was hoping for some more time with him before I left, but seeing the turmoil he is in, with what I am not sure, I am sure it is not all about just me, everything together, but I see he really needed his time alone. I don't always understand people's need to be alone. I do love my alone time, truly, but if there is an opportunity to share energies with someone, then I want that over alone. I understand everyone is different, and I try to leave it at that.
February
2, 2002 Oh, I felt so much better this morning. My energy is better, so today was the day to pack up and leave Quartzsite, but that is much easier said than done. It wasn't the packing, but the leaving that was difficult. Having made so many friends, I made the rounds saying goodbye. I am coming back to pick up my trailer, but most of the people will be gone by then. Just when I thought I couldn't fit one more thing in my car, I would find something else that had to go with me and I would somehow find room. Oh the curse of having too much stuff. I packed and cleaned the trailer, making it more comfortable for Don. He will be sleeping in here when I am gone, and he just doesn't need to have my dirty socks laying around. Ha. I did tell him to eat all the food he wants and feel free to listen to whatever cd's I left behind, burn the incense, drink the beer, make himself at home. He says he will, I really hope he does. I want him to be comfortable, I will really miss him, and it makes me feel better, knowing he will be staying in the trailer while I am gone. ~~~ I actually got to know Dean and Blue better today, chatting with them off and on. Last night I had shown them the photos of the sunsets I have captured which led into computers, websites and such. We exchanged emails to keep in touch. I think they would be interesting to keep in touch with, always on the road, digging rock, selling and trading, true gypsies. I envy those who are able to live this life. Someday I will for real. ~~~ After the goodbyes, the one person I saved the last goodbye for was Don. He has been so good to me, our friendship has flourished. I see him opening up and becoming more comfortable with what we are to each other, it is a moment to moment thing. That type of love is not typical for him, it is one he will either get used to or not. If not, then our friendship will be the lasting power. I adore Don, he has been my best new friend out here. It was so hard to leave. ~~~ But I had to, and I did. My gas tank had enough gas to get me to the next town, or so I thought. I have to remember, I am in the desert, not traveling through California where there are gas stations every 20 miles. I should have gassed up in Quartzsite, but I was just wanting to get out of there, it was so hard leaving for some reason. I began sweating it, watching the tank get more and more empty, wondering where the next station was. I felt the car lurching, knowing what that meant, just as I saw the oasis in the desert, tall signs, Texaco...Yay. I nursed it to the offramp, coasted down, rolled through the stop sign, into the station where the car died at the pump. Nothing like living life on the edge. ~~~ Back on the road, I decided to avoid Phoenix altogether, knowing I would be running headfirst into rush hour, I took an alternate route, which took me by some awesome countryside, I was so glad I took that road. I drove with my camera in my lap, having grand intentions of pulling off the road for photos, but everytime I wanted to, there wasn't a good place to pull over, so I just let my eyes soak it up. ~~~ I got to Tucson about 7:30 at night, following the directions to Kimberly's house. I had called, and she was not going to be here, but her aunt would be. I can't believe I actually found her place in the dark, just having faith in the directions, it was all I could do. Actually, if I got lost I would have bought a map. I was dusty and dirty, tired and still not feeling 100%. When Kimberly and her Grandmother got back to the house, we had all decided to go out for the evening. Once I showered I felt much more alive and ready to have some fun. We went to a country bar (Grandma stayed home though) which immediately reminded me that I do not know how to do the two-step. Her Aunt is wonderful at it, Kimberly even looked good out there, I sucked. I danced one dance and realized I don't like doing things I am not good at. So I opted to sit and enjoy watching, which was perfectly ok with me. Then Kimberly mentioned there was Reggae going on at another bar. Yes, I LOVE Reggae, so we decided to go there. It was early, still only 10, the bar was not really busy yet, we had a couple drinks. She has a friend there, Gary, who is the bouncer, who we talked with for a while. I thought he was an interesting man, and good energy. Then a friend of Kimberly's walked in, which changed things a bit. The two of them began talking intensely, and wanting to give them some space, I went out and sought out Gary, the only other person I kinda knew, or at least met. We talked for a bit, not too long though, since he was working, and I agreed to have dinner with him while I am here if time permits. I went back in to the bar, Kim and him were still talking, so I moved by the dance floor and was quickly asked to dance. From that point on, I danced with I think 2 guys for quite some time. Oh well, I had fun anyway. After the bar closed, Gary asked if I wanted to go out for breakfast, which I accepted. I had only eaten cheerios that morning. Oh wait, I had a salad too, but not nearly enough. He was fun. We had a good time. I don't think we got back to Kim's house until after 3:30 or so. She had just gotten home, and she and I laid there in bed talking about the night. Just like when we were back in high school. February
3, 2002 Well, this morning came early. Out til all hours of the night, drinking and partying, with a head cold, no less. Don't you feel sorry for me? It's ok, neither did the the Wild Things once I told them I was out late last night. I hung around Kim's house until it was time to set up. By the time I got there, my head felt like a balloon ready to explode. The ladies next to me gave me a decongestant. I really hate taking them, but I was miserable. I stopped early on the setting up, deciding I could finish in the morning. I went to the Wild room and visited with them for a bit, pulling beads for an order and generally making a nuisance of myself. The wild bunch invited me out to dinner tomorrow night, there is a friend of theirs who is playing guitar at the Casbah. Not much else, just tired and stuffy...time for bed.
February
4, 2002 Today was a good show. Not excellent, but promising! I visited with vendors I haven't seen since Bead Stampede shows, some I have only ever heard of, and new ones I got to meet. I think this will be a good show. The women next to me and I ordered a pizza today, it was nice. Tomorrow I am making sure to stop at the store to get water and snacks. I get so hungry and dehydrated, when I am alone I don't often stop for such things. It is hard to leave the booth when you are alone. I met some great new customers. I really love these shows, I really do. After the show I went to the Rodeway to meet J-Me, Guy and Vi so we could all go out to dinner. Alan was there at the restaurant, and I met a couple new people, which is always nice. The food was great, vegetarian, the music was great as well, company was wonderful, lots of laughs and fun, and I had a blast tonight. Oh! While at the restaurant, Juan, hippie boy walked in! It was great! Funny, Tucson is a huge town, to run into so many people you know at one place is fun. Don called me today! It was so nice to hear him. He is enjoying the trailer, which is way cool. I am glad he is taking advantage of it. He said that now he knows why I didn't wander out until 8:30 or 9 each morning, because with coffee, warmth and music, he has been doing the same! Cute. I so like him, he is such a gentle person. Even his voice is gentle. That is a good thing. February
5, 2002 Sales were great today! I was busy, and tonight I am tired for it. I barely got to the show in time, hanging out here in the morning with Kimberly chatting, I left just in time to get sort of lost driving there and 5 minutes to spare before 10. There is a security guard who stands there, sunglasses on, often right in front of my booth. This guy is a funny bird. He has these red lips on his neck, I am trying to figure out if it is a tattoo or what. Like kiss lips. Funny. He makes me a little uncomfortable actually, standing there arms crossed, you can't see where he is looking, and at times it feels like he is looking right at you. I hate it. The day went by so fast, it must have been because I was busy. I love it that way. After the show I went to the Wild room and visited with them for a while, then came home. I was supposed to come home early to visit with Kimberly, but business took over, had to get more beads. More beads. I love them. I don't really have much to say, it was a busy but uneventful day. Tomorrow night, Kimberly and I want to go out, she doesn't have the kids, so we will hit the town or something. Thursday I have a dinner date with Gary and I am going to see if she can come along, she and Gary are friends, then Friday again, no kids, so we will hit the town again. Yay! I now need to get some sleep...these shows wear me out.
February
8, 2002 These last several of days have been a blur. I am loving it though, in the midst of a show, meeting new customers, making them happy by selling them beads that they love, smoozing with the other vendors and just having a great time. I heard a great story, and this is just proof of how nuts people are when it comes to an obsession...whatever it happens to be, including beads. On the opening day of one of the big bead shows here in town, there were a mass of people surrounding this one booth, waiting for him to open. One of the ladies, an older woman, was there with an obviously swolen wrist that needed to have bones set and gashes on her head. Apparently she had been in a car accident. The man who was selling the beads found this out and shocked, said there was a hospital right across the street. She said she knew this, and the way she figured it, that hospital was going to be there, but those beads would not, and she wanted first pick. Nuts, these bead addicts, I am telling you. People high on beads. ~~~ I have thoroughly enjoyed my time with Kimberly. It has been so long since we have had time to visit. Not like we have had days and days, it has been after the show hours, and then we have gone out a couple nights, most have been low key. It is tough to remember all that went on this week, truly, it has flown by. I have not kept up on writing, leaving in the morning, busy at the show, and after the show has been busy as well, crashing at night with little energy left...writing has not been first and foremost on my mind yet I have missed it terribly. I truly love writing, at times it seems to almost calm me down inside with life so hectic, tapping away on the keyboard seems to give me peace. Tonight Kimberly and I went out to dinner with the Wild Things bunch. She met us at the restaurant, but before dinner, I went to the wild room to meet them. I met a very interesting man there tonight, he is an awesome jewelry designer. We clicked, instantly talking about everything which led to me asking if he wanted to join us for dinner. He needs some work done on his website. It seems I am getting myself into webwork, which could be good for me. We will see. Carl is his name, I am impressed with his work, along with the other art he had in his portfolio. This man is incredibly talented, and the passion he puts into his work is obvious. I have met some incredible people this trip, I feel very fortunate. I may be talking about him a little in the future, if I do some web work for him, I will probably fly to see him. He lives in Santa Fe, and I would love to visit there. I drove him to the restaurant, Kimberly met us there after the rest of the bunch got there, we waited forever for a table, there were 11 of us, and it was a little Indian restaurant, with tables for 4, on a Friday night, waiting for 3 tables to clear near each other so we could make one big one was tough...but we made it. It was alot of fun, with Kimberly talking to Alan, I was sitting next to Eden who was being so silly and I was encouraging her, Guy was next to her trying to eavesdrop in on our conversation, since it was obviously of the spicy sort and he is such a nosy one...of course we were teasing him with it, not letting him in on it. ~~~ Later, I had a mishap. I was trying to cut a piece of the lamb in half when my fork slipped, knocking off the other piece onto the floor after bouncing off my lap, then off of Kimberly's purse. It was a dilemma. So, here we are, at dinner, with this huge chunk of meat on the floor, what do I do with it? I can't put it back on the plate, cant put it on the table, I didn't want to kick it under the table, so I left it. It was out of the way, but it distracted me the entire meal. I kept looking down at it, then Kimberly who was the only other one in the know, laughing each time I saw it. At the end of the meal, I just put my napkin down there, picked it up and put it on my plate with the napkin still over it. I didn't know what else to do. We really all had a wonderful time. February
9, 2002 Last day for this bead show, it is always so sad, saying goodbyes. It was a good, lucrative day however. It is funny, when a show ends, you see vendors going around, trying to wrap up the loose ends of the many trades they have agreed to during the show. People darting here, picking out what they want, others wandering, looking for more stuff. More stuff, it's what we all need! I begin packing up early, trying to go through stuff under my tables, organizing it, saving time for the actual loading and breaking down. There are hooks to be closed, totes to be packed, paperwork to be saved out for the last minute/important box. The big challenge was getting everything puzzled back into my car just the way I came here with it. I had it fitting just perfect on the way here, I was beginning to doubt I could do it again, but I did. Yea. It took me forever to load up though, and it is so obviously weighted down, the back just nearly resting on the tires. Well, it isn't all that bad, but you do notice it. I always bring too much. It's an illness. I wish the show would have lasted another week, but then again, I am anxious to get home. ~~~ At one point during the day, Kimberly called me. She said her and Dean were going to have dinner and wine at her house, that it would be great if I would join them. I accepted. Dinner was nice, we had pasta and red wine. Conversation was good, listening to music and talked. Next month I will be jumping out of an airplane, helping a friend celebrate her birthday. Since Dean has made many jumps, he was telling me all about it, how to land, how to NOT panic (ha) and such. I cant wait now. Since I will be leaving in a few days, it was nice to spend some time relaxing with her. Kim and I go back so far, and because of that, she is so easy to be around. I hope to see her more often now that I am travelling around doing the shows.
February
10, 2002 This morning, the wind was blowing something awful outside, and there was conversation on whether I should go on this motorcycle ride that I had planned on taking with Gary. He has a group of friends that ride every other weekend or so, this weekend was going to be Tubac, about an hour south of Tucson. I called Gary, he seemed to think the group would still be going, but would call me at 9:30. When he did, we had gotten back in bed and fell asleep again. The ride was on, so I hopped up and showered to wake the sleep out of my eyes. The ride was excellent, this group of friends, very nice and Gary was extremely trustworthy on his bike. I trusted his driving, which made the ride so enjoyable. The scenery is so much nicer on a bike. It was cold though, and fortunately, he had brought an extra leather jacket and gloves, along with the helmet. It is not law in Arizona to wear a helmet, but I feel much better with one on. We went down there, walked around and enjoyed some of the crafts, then had some food. The restaurant was very comfortable, and the food was excellent. All of his friends were fun, so we had a great time. I feel so at ease in Gary's presence. You know, when we began getting to know each other, there was a little strain, but today, while walking around, I felt total ease with him. In the beginning, he wasn't sure of what to make of me, and he isn't exactly talkative about his feelings, so I wasn't sure about him. Gary is a big guy, of course, being the bouncer at the bar. He can be a rather imposing man, but I see the softness inside of him, he really doesn't hide it all that carefully. :) We got back to town around 3:30, he rode me back to Kimberly's house, and we made plans to meet later tonight. ~~~ I went to the Wild room, visited with all of them a bit. There was a young girl there who had visited me at my booth, lives in Seattle and is a new direct importer. I had told her to make sure to go by the Wild room, which she did and J-Me was telling her some of the ropes. This is such a cut throat market, the fact that J was willing to do even a little is pretty amazing. Most other importers would only not WANT to help her, but would try to hurt her in some way. It is really rough. She is so cute and fragile looking that I worry she will not be tough enough. I hope she makes it, she is just the sweetest thing. We all talked business for a while and Gary called. I had been waiting for his call, he had to take his mom into the hospital, nothing serious, but they were releasing her to go back home. He still wanted to go out, he just had to make sure she was home and safe before he could. We met at the bar he works at. I had figured, since he knew everyone that he would get stuck talking, but he avoided it and we had a wonderful time. He is just so much fun to get inside of, since he has this really hard exterior. We had a wonderful connection tonight.
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